🍑 Dwayne Haskin parties with strippers

Surprising additions to the TOTW & CEH update - Dec 22

Good morning to you all, especially Big Ben. Thank you for the Christmas gift of enjoyment during a Bengals game (as a Bengals fan).

I hope y’all are ready - this will be the last week of the Huddle for 2020… because who cares what happens after the fantasy season is over.

Week 15 Team of the Week

As of Monday night:

QB: Jalen Hurts - With almost 40 points, Jalen Hurts was the overall top player in fantasy this past weekend. Coming into the league as a Lamar Jackson/Kyler Murray gadget type athlete, all Hurts needed was an opportunity. And boy did Carson Wentz roll out the red carpet. Doug Pederson will start Jalen Hurts again next Sunday (or else he should be locked up).

RB: David Montgomery - Look, I don’t think Montgomery is good, and neither do the analytical nerds. But his stats speak for themselves. A week after a RB1 finish, Montomgery does it again, with 146 yards and 2 TDs. This is a note to self for next year - draft RBs with heavy volume projections… Montgomery turned 32 touches into 28+ points.

WR: Calvin Ridley - Read on for more facts about Calvin. He’s still incredible without Julio and paced all WRs in Week 15. 10 catches, 163 yards, and 1 TD. Have a day brother, have a day! 25+ fantasy points.

TE: Darren Waller - Death, taxes, and Darren Waller producing in the fantasy playoffs. For the second time in three weeks, Waller led you to a W. And you deserve it. 24+ points despite the QB change. Mariota starting next week is good news for Waller.

D/ST: Dallas Cowboys - Ah just as we suspected. The typically trash defense leads the NFL in fantasy points during the first round of the playoffs despite allowing 450+ yards… Sick. Real talks, my leagues might play without D/ST next year.

K: Bruce Lee

Dwayne Haskins fiddles with some strippers

Taking over for John Wall, Dwayne Haskins was spotted partying with strippers after the loss to Seattle. Oh boy:

“Second Fiddle” Stars

Calling players by their first names cracks me up. Anyways, the following players are considered the 2nd option on their teams, but shouldn’t be:

Calvin Ridley in five games without Julio Jones this season:

  • Week 3: 5-110-0

  • Week 5: 8-136-0

  • Week 12: 6-50-1

  • Week 14: 8-124-1

  • Week 15: 10-163-1

Tony Pollard without Zeke:

  • 52-of-58 snaps

  • 75% of the RB carries

  • Averaged 7.3 yards per touch

  • 100% of the carries inside the 5-yard line

  • Zeke has a $90M contract (actual LOL)

Ito Smith (remember our deep dive on him last week?) is the top waiver RB:

  • Raheem Morris says Todd Gurley’s role has changed. Morris said Ito Smith is the lead runner right now

  • Yes he does have ways to go before he’s as good as the two other guys

Patty Mahomes new profile picture

You recognize this stud?

Yup it’s Walrus Reid. Look at that stash. That guy f***s.

A reporter asked Andy Reid for his thoughts about the picture and this is what he had to say.

Clyde-Edwards Helaire’s Health

After being forced into the splits, there doesn’t appear to be any structural damage. Sources say he’ll have a shot for the playoffs depending on how rehab goes, but he’s done for the regular season.

BONUS

  • Cam Akers has a high ankle sprain, Sean McVay says, which will cause him to miss this next game, at least.

  • Brandon Aiyuk is the WR3 in terms of PPG since Week 7…

  • Josh Gordon was added to the Seahawks roster

Thank you all - good day and congrats on making the finals. If you’re interested in seeing who made the pro bowl, go f*** yourself! The pro bowl sucks and I refuse to support it until the league adds trampolines and forces full contact.

But here’s the pro bowl list:

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